Procrastination

It has been a long time since I posted a “Monday Meditation.” Not because God isn’t working in my life, but because He has. At least that’s what I’ve been telling myself.

“I’ll post about this, Lord, when I’ve had a chance to process this.” Uh-huh. And we can all see how consistent I’ve been with this.

Okay, so yesterday during my quiet time with the Lord, I asked the Lord to speak to me through the preaching of His Word. And oh my, did He ever answer that request! Even through my own teaching in Sunday school. Isn’t He good?

We’ve been studying Kay Arthur’s book, Lord, I Need Grace to Make It Today. And we are now on the last chapter. It wraps up everything we’ve learned over the past few months and brings the concept of God’s grace for every day into focus—what it looks like. Yesterday we discussed the concept of grace and those who are mentioned in Hebrews 11. We then went on to tie it in to the exhortations in Hebrews 12. It is by remembering those great men and women of faith who have gone on before us and keeping our eyes on Jesus, the author and perfecter of our faith, that we are able to appropriate God’s grace, sufficient for each day.

In the morning service, our pastor is finishing up a series in Acts that has been ongoing over the past couple of years. In yesterday’s passage, Felix puts off making a decision for Christ. While Pastor Jim made the obvious connection and exhortation not to put off the decision to follow Christ in salvation, he also pointed out that we all have something in our lives we’re procrastinating on. Nothing popped into my mind immediately. Well, nothing that I couldn’t “explain” away.

However, the question Pastor asked at the end of the message has run over and over in my mind. And this morning I realized that, in His goodness, God put His finger on several things I’ve been procrastinating about. Posting to my blog in one, especially on those things where God is working.

Writing is another area. It goes in “fits and starts,” as my Grandma Paton used to say. Saturday, I attended a Storycrafter’s Seminar that Susan May Warren taught. She gave us tons of tools to help us write the novels we all had in mind when we came. Seventy-five people, young teen to older adults, drank in what Susie said. I know, for me, she gave so many good techniques that appeal to my “give-me-a-pattern” mentality. I’m one who works best with an outline, a detailed plan. Not too much that it stifles my creativity as I write, but enough to keep me from staring endlessly at a blank page.

And there are a couple more things in my life that I’m procrastinating on. Still, I held back from committing these things to the Lord. Until I caught a sentence in a devotional I’ve been pondering over the past few days. It wasn’t until this morning that I caught this sentence:

“Procrastination precludes deliverance, because it seeks My blessings today while refusing to accept them until tomorrow.” (Make Haste My Beloved by Frances J. Roberts, published by Barbour Publishing, Inc.)

Because I put off doing what I clearly know is God’s will for me, I’m missing out on God’s blessings. Especially the ones I want today but won’t appropriate until whenever I decide to obey. Ouch! And it’s all related to who/what I’m putting my trust in, who I’m allowing to be in control. Double ouch!

I’m a little slow to learn, it seems, but I’m seeing more and more how everything in life is related to faith and trust—my actions, fears, and doubts all point to what I value most. And it’s sobering how many my struggles are a result of my wanting to be in control, putting off what God asks me to do until I’m “ready,” yet wanting God’s immediate deliverance.

Yes, He still hears my prayers, and He does provide my every need. But how much am I missing out on because I want to have the best of both worlds? Sobering thoughts, and yes, I’m spending a lot of time repenting and getting my mind back on the thing that is most important—my faith-walk with Jesus Christ, trusting Him in every area of life.